Winter's Thaw
by lonelyprinces
Summary: One-shot, NOT SessRin. Sesshomaru can't have anyone thinking he's grown soft all of a sudden. Well, nobody but Rin, perhaps.


It wasn't often, in the inky black of these woods, that Sesshomaru happened upon a comfortable place to rest—especially when he had his band of tiny followers to consider. A-Un needed plenty of space to graze; Jaken, a nook far enough away that his stench (or his snores, for that matter) wouldn't be entirely distracting. Rin needed a soft place to sleep, too—preferably a thick, mossy turf that wouldn't attract many twigs or burrs.

Sesshomaru stood at the edge of this new, cozy clearing, staring up into the starless sky. The fire popped and crackled at his back, interspersed with Rin's heavy breaths as she dreamt. Jaken slept with his face planted in the dirt, just as spent as Rin was.

They _had_ done their fair share of traveling today, Sesshomaru considered, rolling his aching shoulders. Even for an inu youkai. Nothing a long soak in the nearest hot spring wouldn't solve, anyway, but he'd have to be more careful with his mortal companions.

It was just when Sesshomaru had set upon sniffing out the very onsen in question that he heard one of Rin's high-pitched yelps—the familiar "kya!" she used whenever Jaken chased her, brandishing his wooden staff.

"Rin," Sesshomaru said flatly, without turning. "That's enough. Stop it."

Rin cried out again—more a shriek this time, loud and piercing.

"Impudent girl!" Jaken squawked into the black. "Disturbing Sesshomaru-sama in this manner—"

And then, silence—from Rin, and Jaken too.

Sesshomaru spun to face them both. Jaken stood quite still, staring at the prostrate girl and clutching nonsensically at his throat. Rin's face, a pale oval even in the firelight, was streaked with tears, her eyes squeezed as tight as they would go.

"Rin," Sesshomaru said tonelessly, as the child's body wracked with sobs. He found he didn't quite know what to do with his hands; they hung limp and heavy at his sides.

The crying didn't stop—in fact, it seemed to grow more tinged with panic than ever. Sesshomaru, always so in tune with every sense, felt those sobs to be the only sound for miles.

He didn't recall moving, but soon found himself kneeling before her, the heavy white folds of his hakama caking with dirt.

"Rin," he said again, hardly believing that faint voice to be his own. He placed a hand on Rin's shoulder, startled at its great size beside her feeble body. Startled all the more still when Rin jerked awake and, realizing who knelt above her, pulled his hand to her cheek, the tiny fingers of one hand curling around his thumb. Her cheek was cold and pallid; her jaw quivered faintly.

"Sesshomaru-sama," she whimpered, wiping at her face with her free hand. The other hand continued to cling to Sesshomaru's claw.

Jaken, on the periphery, hopped up and down like a madman. "All this, for a bad dream? Why, when Sesshomaru-sama realizes what you've done, girl—"

"Jaken. Leave us," Sesshomaru snapped, gaze pale and imperious.

Jaken stumbled away, muttering something in a low voice about taking A-Un out for her midnight feeding. Soon the clearing was quiet again, save for the occasional hiccup as Rin's breathing slowed. With a small huff, she pushed herself into a sitting position.

"I'm sorry, Sesshomaru-sama," she said, eyes wide as an owl's. "And I'm sorry to Jaken-sama too." She glanced about her, as if only just realizing the imp had disappeared.

"Don't be silly."

"But you were just off to find an onsen, weren't you?" Rin said meekly. "You were looking forward to it, because we were all so dirty and Jaken-sama and I can be noisy sometimes, and …" Rin's shoulders slumped. "I'm sorry, Sesshomaru-sama, I'm really, really sorry!"

" _Rin_ ," Sesshomaru chided, "You were having a nightmare." A far more pressing matter than personal hygiene, surely.

"Uh-huh," Rin acknowledged, quickly wiping the last of her tears away.

"Hm."

"About … home. Before. It happens sometimes," Rin confessed. "Only this time I woke up and I was … and I was crying and everything." Rin's eyes, still round and wide, stared intently at the ground, the sky—anything but the youkai before her. "I was so hungry and sad back then, so I still have lots of dreams about it, even when I'm here. With you and Jaken-sama and A-Un and everyone, even when I'm—when I'm happy."

"You are … happy?" Sesshomaru said dumbly, staring at the empty space just beyond Rin's shoulder.

In that moment Rin glanced up, meeting Sesshomaru's gaze and breaking into a huge, gap-toothed smile.

"You've always been so kind, Sesshomaru-sama."

 _But I haven't_ , Sesshomaru thought immediately. _Certainly not to any full-blooded human._

It was not until Rin squeezed his hand in hers that he realized he was still cupping her cheek. A cheek that flared with warmth, this time.

"So strong and kind …" she singsonged, almost to herself. "And even sometimes to Jaken-sama."

"That's quite enough." He stood, brushing the dirt off his knees. The warmth of the hot spring felt doubly enticing, now. He needed to cleanse himself of … of _whatever_ this feeling was.

As he strode away through the thick, errant branches and deep into the forest, he couldn't help but overhear Rin giggling behind him, calling out to Jaken to return.

"That Sesshomaru-sama!" Jaken griped, stamping his little feet. "Couldn't even bother with an apology to his trusted vassal. And I've been by his side for fifty years!"

Rin giggled. "That's Sesshomaru-sama for you!"

"Well," Jaken harrumphed, "You're not wrong."

Sesshomaru almost allowed himself a smile. If his loyal servant of fifty years hadn't witnessed his moment of kindness, could one really say it had happened at all? Besides, as Lord of the Western Lands, he couldn't very well have all of Nihon thinking he'd grown soft all of a sudden. No, that wouldn't do at all.

* * *

 _ **Alternately titled "Schrodinger's Youkai."**_


End file.
